It’s raining outside, “my Sun” is finally sleeping next to me, so hundred of thoughts flied into my mind. I stopped over at this one: Inspiring people!
I remembered immediately the people that inspired me trough these years. Each and one of them. I met a lot and I really mean a lot people in my life. I use to work with people for other people, so
the human contact let’s say it’s my favorite and the strongest feature/attribute.
At the very beginning I use to look at men as an mentors. I tried to understand their mind, their strength so I can relate with my story and later create my future.
It turns out it didn’t work out, simply because I am a woman and I can not project a life being a man into a woman’s body and my story was way too complicated to be solved that easy and that fast.
It turn out the men mentor was the thing missing but impossible to be replaced. I understood that quite late but I am happy I got there. I missed my father 31 years, I had to completely loose him
last year when he died and I realize that I won’t miss him anymore. I lost something I never had …
Solved the father figure issue, that’s one thing done! What happened with the rest?
The rest was again complicated but I realized that shutting my mouth, listening more, avoiding poisoning people and doing what ever the hell I want, was more inspiring than ever.
I use to be that kind of girl, that would do anything, would sacrifice herself, her well being for others.That would listen for hours to the same shit just to be nice, that would work an extra mile
just for a little recognition, that would clean up a huge mess just for a simple thank you. It was crazy…completely crazy!
I got at this point in my life when the pain, the suffering has reached above limits, and I asked myself: Where do you want to be? What is your future?
I discovered and rediscovered myself in Poland, where I use to live for two amazing years. Amazing just because I had the chance to breathe, to run, to laugh, to drink,to smoke, to sleep, to eat with
all my body and all my senses. I never cared, not for one single second what others might think about it and I was sooooooo happy!
I was “selfish”, I started to love myself :)
I would to thank today, all the amazing beautiful women that inspired me trough all these years, women with brilliant careers, beautiful healthy bodies and smart personalities.
Above everything I would like to thank myself for waking up and getting out of that life, that I would never want to go back! No regrets!
I hope and I think and I know for sure, my story inspired others, that will live the way they want, true to themselves in harmony with their feelings and beliefs.
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